The Smart Divorce® Weblog

Move forward with focus, hope, and confidence.


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My Money Mindset – Finances During Divorce

Now posted on The Smart Divorce on Divorce Source Radio

One of the biggest fears post-divorce are finances.  Trusting yourself to make financial choices is a big issue, especially when it comes to your divorce settlement.  Our guest, Dr. Deborah Nixon, helps us to understand what we need to do.  Dr. Nixon is an entrepreneur, professor, executive, consultant, and community volunteer; she has identified a common need in today’s cautious working environment for trusting professional relationships. Economic instability has undercut our readiness to trust one another – and this is especially hard in divorce.  We’re gong to relate this all to your post-divorce life.

Dr. Nixon helps us understand the importance of building and maintaining trust in ourselves when making financial decisions – especially when it’s post-divorce, and the worry is “what about my future?”   She has developed the MyMoneyMindset and Trust Intelligence Program and shares her work, to help us with financial decision-making. We discuss the intangibles of trust, reputation and integrity to make them tangible and practical.

To understand how these goals are met in reasonable manner we explore:

  • Defining Moments as a pivot point for deeper understanding of financial decision-making
  • How assessments, coaching and consulting have helped clients learn to take charge of their money while helping professionals learn what their clients need from them.
  • Helping to develop Financial Wellness
  • The 10 Minute Survey
  • The importance of feeling strong so that you can manage your money

My Money Mindset will help you make better and more informed decisions about your money. Tackle those hard issues. A raise, the family budget, a financial plan, your relationship with your financial professional. Don’t you owe it to yourself! Isn’t your peace of mind worth it? This interview will surely help you understand what trust means, trust breaches and trust repair. Fascinating stuff.

To find out more, contact Dr. Nixon at Deborah@mymoneymindset.com, or call 416-986-7049

Don’t forget, Like us on our Facebook pagesThe Smart Divorce and Divorce Source Radio.  Join the community!

To listen tune in here


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Five Steps to a Healthier You, Post-Divorce

Make no mistake; divorce is upper case Emotional. When I decided to leave my marriage, I could not imagine how I would ever say the “d” word to my children or spell out how their lives would change. While I accepted whole-heartedly that my priority was to put my children’s best interests first, I was also painfully aware of how my world was uncoupling and changing. Even though almost 40 per cent of marriages end in divorce, I felt little comfort from a statistic.

At first, I felt very overwhelmed most days. I vividly recall many dreams of moving through scary-divorce-land bogged down by a big bad trunk of fear, anxiety, guilt and anger. I knew I had to unload the trunk to get anywhere but I did not want to “deal.” And, who could even think of dating. But the truth is, that while I knew it was important to put my children’s best interests first, I also knew that it was important to get my own life on track if I was going to be a good parent and role model.

As I began to rebuild my life post-split I quickly realized I had choices — I could choose to be a victim, or I could choose to move on, and it was up to me to build a good life, a happy and fulfilling life. Yes, the future was fraught with uncertainty but I reframed that thought and looked at what I could do to make life better, happier and brighter. The life I’ve now created is beyond my wildest dreams. If anyone would have told me in the darkest of my emotional days that I would be a divorce coach, a best selling Canadian author, a keynote speaker at The Divorce Party — and so much more, I would have told them they were dreaming. But, by opening myself up to new experiences and being open minded, I learned that divorce is rich in opportunity to learn and grown from — and grow I did.

To find out the 5 steps, read the full article here 


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The Family Support Expo is coming to Toronto!

Don’t miss out on the 1st annual Family Support Expo  — Raising Awareness, Reducing Stigma Separation and Divorce The Toronto International Centre will be the home of the Family Support Expo on October 20 -21, 2012

Supporting families in transition, from pregnancy through adolescence and beyond!

The first North American expo bringing together all of the resources needed to support families dealing with Separation & Divorce, Medical, Mental Health, and other lifestyle issues.

The Family Support Expo is for parents, grandparents, caregivers, children and professionals.  The Expo provides information to help build and support a healthy family.

Exhibitors will showcase a variety of services and products and will offer access to community resources, organizations and experts in the industry.

All families experience challenges. Whether it is a child struggling with a medical issue or special need, a senior suffering from an illness, a family on the heels of divorce or separation, or another serious challenge – you are not alone and help is available.

The Expo seeks to revolutionize how families deal with these challenges.

The 3 general areas of focus for the Expo are:

Within these three areas there are many sub-categories.

Separation & Divorce

  • Help finding a professional (Family Mediator, Family Lawyer, Accountant, Real Estate Agent, mortgage broker, etc.)
  • Education and resources to help your family moving forward

Please stop by my booth, Deborah Moskovitch – The Smart Divorce and Divorce Coach, where I will be speaking and selling my resources helping individuals through their divorce  — maintaining their sanity, cutting down on legal costs, and helping to manage the divorce process in a healthier and happier way.

I will also be participating in a panel discussion with Toronto’s leading divorce professionals and moderated by Breakfast Television’s very own Kevin Frankish.

Don’t miss out on this new and unique event.  While the Expo cannot guarantee solutions to all areas of challenge, it stands to provide families with actionable advice and support that will leave them hopeful and optimistic moving forward.

For more information visit: http://familysupportexpo.com


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How to Be Smart About Mediation

Understanding what mediation is as a process, and finding the right mediator, are critical elements to developing  smart and long lasting parenting and financial agreements that are predicated on informed, thoughtful decision making.  A good mediator will discuss what your goals are for the process, what is important to each of you and will help you to craft a plan that addresses those goals and intentions.  This is important to understand, as all mediators are not created equal!

Our guest, Cara Raich, (http://www.srmediators.com/mediators/cara-raich-esq/)  (http://mediatetrix.wordpress.com/) explores the specifics of mediation in this episode of The Smart Divorce, with Deborah Moskovitch and Steve Peck.   Cara is a mediator and attorney who specializes in helping people find non-adversarial resolutions to conflict. She mediates a wide range of cases including divorce, family conflicts, and organizational and civil disputes.

Cara is dedicated to helping her clients avoid the challenges and acrimony that frequently accompany adversarial proceedings. She does this by enabling her clients to come to realistic and informed agreements that work for them and their families. Cara believes that separation and divorce are family matters with a legal element, not a lawsuit that happens to be about a family.

To understand how these goals are accomplished in a fair and reasonable manner – and gain perspectives on alternative ways to view mediation and settlement we discuss:

  • What does neutrality really mean?
  • What are the process choices that people have when contemplating divorce?
  • How do we as a society view divorce?
  • What is a successful divorce?
  • What is the role the law will play in your divorce? Is the law relevant, determinative or something in between?

This interview will surely help you understand the many aspects of mediation.

To listen, click on the link http://www.divorcesourceradio.com/be-smart-about-mediation/ 


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Life Post Divorce: Cooking For One

Life after divorce: Cooking for one

Tips and recipes to keep you healthy and happy when you’re eating on your own

By:

 Deborah Moskovitch

life after divorce

istockphoto.com

Regain your lust for healthy living
It’s more a factor of laziness, rather than anything else. I take pride in ensuring my children eat well, preparing healthy, nutritious and delicious meals. But when it comes to cooking for one – when my kids are with their dad – well, there’s a bit of slippage. I figure, what’s wrong with an occasional bowl of cereal for dinner, followed by a 100-calorie snack or two? Sometimes I indulge in my favorite: cottage cheese and noodles. At my laziest, I grab a decadent chocolate bar for lunch, followed by an apple for dessert.  But there are alternatives.

I think I’ve figured wrong when I read about the importance of healthy eating. As I celebrate the wisdom gained through age and maturity, sadly, my metabolism doesn’t grow, but rather my midsection. To help get me out of this rut, I enlisted the help of leading Canadian nutritionist Barbie Casselman for the times when I’m cooking for one.

“If we want to stay healthy, feel better and look younger, we have to change our lifestyle,” says Casselman. “By which I mean all the factors that contribute to the way we eat, the exercise we get, stress, cigarette and alcohol consumption, our relationships and our spiritual outlook.”

To read the whole article, and tasty recipes from Barbie Casseleman’s book – Good For You Cooking,

Click on the link:

http://www.more.ca/attitude/wining-and-dining/life-after-divorce-cooking-for-one/a/41910


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Save Time, Money and Your Sanity When Going Through Divorce

Want to learn more about The Smart Divorce Resource ToolKit, listen in as Steve Peck and I talk about how to have The Smart Divorce.

The very word “divorce” conjures up fear, sadness, anger, confusion and, for some, relief.  But the reality of what divorce really looks like and means with all of its implications are not always clear.  With close to 50% of marriages ending in divorce, we need to better employ strategies that will keep everyone, including those caught in the middle – often the children – moving towards a better life. Divorce can be a beginning even if it looks like an end.

No matter who you are, what your finances look like, whether you have children or working through issues, divorce can be complex and complicated, but it doesn’t need to be.  Almost all of us have questions, deal with problems and are faced with the myriad of concerns as we navigate the maze of divorce.

Hear Deborah Moskovitch and Steve Peck discuss the concerns and questions most of us have through divorce and the importance of making smart decisions – all with the help of The Smart Divorce Resource ToolKit.

Topics include:

  • The emotional, legal and finances of divorce
  • Smart Co-Parenting
  • Rebuilding your life to build a better future
  • Coping with divorce in the workplace
  • Understanding workplace stress
  • How organizations can help employees  stay mindful on the job

“Like” Divorce Source Radio on Facebook between February 8-15 to enter your name in a draw to win a copy of The Smart Divorce Resource ToolKit. 

But, even if you don’t win the free ToolKit, it’s still a win, email info@thesmartdivorce.com to place an order and mention you heard about it on Divorce Source Radio to receive a 10% discount! To preview the program click on the link – http://wp.me/pbONe-gF

Click on the link to listen to this most valuable interview ad learn how you can save time, money and your sanity on the way to a Smart Divorce.

http://www.divorcesourceradio.com/save-time-money-and-your-sanity-when-going-through-divorce/